For the new dad, life is awesome, and parenthood is a wild adventure that’s super-fulfilling. But it’s also stealing his sanity, and you don’t understand why. Here’s what you really need to know about your friend that recently became a dad.
Understanding the new dad (a.k.a your mate)
1. Photos of his kid will flood your newsfeed
Before he entered the village of fatherhood, the new dad would post the funniest, most random things on social media. But now, it’s a selfie of him and his kid. He’s ridiculously proud of keeping his kid alive. If social media is the canvas, his baby is the paint.
2. He won’t answer your text as quickly as he used to
In fact, it might even take him days to reply. Why? Because when you’re expecting him to respond, he’s either dodging his baby’s fluids or trying to figure out why the baby is crying. Also, he might have passed out from exhaustion. Here’s a tip: send that text at 5:45 a.m. when he has about 10 minutes before all hell breaks loose.
3. The new dad isn’t ashamed of making up excuses not to hang out
The one that states he hasn’t got anyone to look after the baby will be his favourite card to play. He still wants you to think he wants to go out, but right now, he wants to be with his son more than he wants to hang with you. Just don’t neglect to invite him. Inviting someone along (even when they’re not going) is always the decent thing to do.
4. When he finally agrees to go out, he’ll embarrass you
The first time the new dad gets to go out, he’ll be that kid on the last day of school. He’ll be the one laughing the loudest, and yes, he’ll be the one ordering shots. Also, he’ll find a way to work his kid into the conversation. The night out is really fun for him but super embarrassing for you.
5. He really loves cereal now
Cereal is a perfectly acceptable meal at any time of the day. It’s not the most balanced, but it’s great for new parents. They barely have the time to eat, let alone cook. So go ahead and enjoy your fancy meal, just don’t tell him about it. He’s still an ex-foodie that occasionally wakes up in the middle of the night, craving a juicy steak.
6. The dad bod is real. He might get fat. Please don’t judge
Before he had kids, the new dad used to look and feel good. But instead of kicking ass on a daily basis, his kids now kick his ass. For him, a win where the kids are concerned is a bowl of ice cream or two cheeseburgers and fries. Plus, the only training he gets these days is when he has to pick his kids up.