Some days make us feel like parental failures. Those are the days that come with nothing but defiance and a lot of shouting. The days that don’t exactly paint the happy family picture. But are these what childhood memories are based on? Or will your kids remember you and the role you played as something else? Will you be remembered as a safe haven or an angry monster? Here’s some advice
Real, lasting childhood memories are based on
All those times they felt safe
Remember the times when your generally patient mom or dad flipped the switch and got really mad? You knew exactly when to start running in those moments. The fear you felt in those moment was very, very real. Aside from the occasional anger outburst, your mom or dad was still the parent that made you feel safe more than they made you feel fear. Parents get angry from time to time. But it is important to chase those monsters away more often than you become them.
Words of encouragement
The power of words is something that’s super significant for our kids. They have no innate sense of self. They don’t have an opinion of who they are or what they can or can’t achieve. All they have are your words of encouragement (or criticism).
Just like your words of encouragement will be remembered one day, so will your family’s attitude and the way you treat each other. If you and hubby are always fighting, your kid will start picking up on that and feel hurt. Words have to be used so carefully around young and developing minds because they really do impact a lifetime worth of memories.
Easter traditions, Christmas, birthdays and Sundays all create special times for making memories that will last a lifetime. It is in those happy and wholesome times that warmth spreads in our hearts and positivity surrounds us. Keep these times sacred and alive for the sake of your kids.
Anthony Withman says: “Too much love never spoils children. Children become spoiled when we substitute presents for presence.” When you give your kid your undivided attention, they thrive. No amount of presents can ever buy your kid a happy childhood or ensure they have good childhood memories. You have to be there, in the moment, to help them create the memories that they’ll carry with them for life.