All women experience weird things and face challenges when they’re pregnant. But by the last stretch of pregnancy, you’re over everything and just want to be un-pregnant. Yes, you might be over the moon about your baby’s impending arrival. But you’re also fed up with the discomforts of third-trimester life. If someone asks you how you feel, here’s how you might actually respond.
Third-trimester life feels like…
1. Get the hell out of my way
If you see a woman in her third trimester wobbling toward you, move. Also, don’t ASK if they want your seat in the line. Don’t make it a question, because they desperately want your seat. Stand up, get your non-pregnant butt out of the seat, and say “Here you go.”
2. Actually, I’ve peed my pants a couple of times
Third-trimester life is that time when you never know whether that feeling is your water breaking or if it’s just your weak bladder again. It happens.
3. I know I look “huuuuge”
Perhaps you weren’t aware of it, but pregnant women grow humans inside their bodies. Their bodies expand because there are actual people in there, hanging out next to their organs. Instead of being an ass and asking if it’s twins, just praise them, okay?
4. Please Susan shut it with your “sleep now” talk.
Ladies in their third trimester are up a billion times at night already, so they know what’s coming. Trying to get comfy in bed while you’re super-pregnant is a full-time job. Sleep isn’t something they do on a regular basis anymore, so save your breath.
5. No, you may not touch it. Ever
A pregnant woman’s body isn’t a watermelon on display at the grocery store. You do not get to grope her to determine her ripeness. If you reach out to touch her, she’ll probably swat you like a fly with absolutely zero regrets.
6. I am just really sick of being pregnant
Third-trimester life feels like it lasts a million days and then some more. It genuinely feels like it will never end. Right now, she feels like she’ll keep getting bigger and bigger until there’s nothing left beside a giant, swollen stomach.
7. I am not made of China. Please don’t be so finicky
Yes this woman’s body hurts, and she’s tired, but she can definitely still get stuff done. In fact, she might even keep working right up to her due date. She might feel miserable, but that does not mean she’s not tough AF.